great post about the necessity of letting go of harmful relationships.

The Hurt Healer

goodbyeoneLooking to the start of a new year can be exciting. It can be the time to plan ahead, and dream of good things to come.

But to make way for new beginnings, it’s important to let go of anything that is going to hinder or harm you. Nobody has an infinite amount of physical time, or emotional energy. So it makes sense to use what we have on relationships that will benefit not drain. That are reciprocal, not a burden.

We all have relationships in our lives that come to a natural end. For whatever reason our contact with that person has run its course. We move on without a sense of loss or pain.

But there are other relationships that we cling to. Or we continue to involve ourselves in, with the hope that there will be a shift in commitment, interest or behaviour. And it’s those interactions…

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How to Make Misery Disappear…

 “If we really love ourselves, everything in our life works.
– Louise L. Hay

Source, Picture credit

To this I would only add that enlightenment comes when all illusion and fear disappear…and we become ourselves. (Or, maybe it’s better said that when we become ourselves, all illusion and fear disappears.) Nice post:)

Monk's Catacomb


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TED Talks

Two of my favourite TED Talk speakers:

Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor

Stroke of Insight

Dr. Brene Brown

The Power of Vulnerability

Listening to Shame


Related: I am Enough, Start Empathy, The Definition of Courage and the Power of Vulnerability, How Vulnerability Leads Us to Freedom

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Reiki – the basic basics

Technically, I am a Reiki Master. Given that I haven’t practiced much, however, I’ll call myself a “practitioner”.

I wanted to post a few words about the most basic aspects of doing Reiki on yourself, because they have worked for me.

First: if you aren’t familiar with the chakra system, please click here to get an idea of what it’s about.

Second: I won’t share the symbols, only because you’re not supposed to.* But, it doesn’t really even matter because it is the intent that you hold behind the symbol that matters (I believe). (It’s all about the intent and the belief.) So, you can use other symbols. For example, animal totems.

Third: there is much debate about the effect of your surroundings. I believe that they are important, because the consistency of their use helps you get into a specific frame of mind. In this case, a meditative frame of mind. So, do maintain the same body position**, do meditate in the same room, with the candles, with the crystals or whatever else you surround yourself with the first time that you do Reiki on yourself. And do get rid of clutter; it’s just aggravating, which doesn’t help with focus.

Fourth: ground yourself. There are many ways to do this. For example, imagine the power of the earth flowing into you from the bottom up and breathe in while you do this. Or, imagine your legs growing thick, long roots, deep into the ground.

Fifth: imagine a beam of white light flowing into you from the top of your head, like a column, through your chakras. (Or, let it flood your whole body or your entire energy field.) This is the Rei (the universal force), Gods healing energy, Gods love…

And those are the very basic basics.

If you like, you can use music or chakra chants and focus on each chakra, one by one. Or only ones that you feel need the most attention.

I mentioned using animal totems as symbols (which they are)…so, for example, if you want freedom (say, from emotional baggage), imagine a white horse (symbol of power and freedom) in your 3rd chakra and keep seeing her there for a few minutes (every day), letting the Rei come in, breathing, feeling your anxiety melting away.

I know that this post is much too short and there is much more to say. So, please, if you’re interested, ask and I’ll see if I have an answer.


*I’ve wondered whether I should post about Reiki at all; it seems to me that making something broadly public takes away from its sacredness, which leads to people not believing in it as much, which, in turn, makes it less effective…I’ll let you comment on that…:D

**although you can do this in pretty much any position, try to sit (with the soles of your feet (if you’re sitting on a chair) or legs on the floor), because standing or laying down will lead you to losing focus; the first because it becomes tiring, the second may lead you to sleep (mind you, if you want to fall asleep, this may be a pretty good sleeping aid. :))

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Dr. Jeff Brantley

Dr. Jeff Brantley, founder and director of the Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Program at Duke Integrative Medicine, reads from his book, “Five Good Minutes At Work,” during a DukeWell seminar. “The five good minutes concept is simple,” Brantley writes in the book. “Take the time, for just five minutes to be present mindfully.”

1. Focus on a calming object. When negative thoughts fill the mind, ground yourself by looking at an object that invokes calmness, such as a plant or a personal photo. Then focus your attention on your breath for several minutes. When your attention wanders toward the negative thoughts, focus it gently again on your breath and the object.
2. Train your attention. Choose a rote task like washing your hands and train yourself to pay attention to the sensations of the moment each time you do it. “This is a way of practicing focusing our attention,” Brantley said…

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